The Canyons (2013) – 2 (IMDb 4.2) – Drama, Thriller (USA)
What happened to Lindsay Lohan? She was supposed to be the next big thing and now she is… Poor girl. I used to be a fan of her work and she used to look great, now look at her! Anyways, The Canyons is quite simply a train-wreck of a movie. Lindsay Lohan co-stars with porn star James Deen (haha, so clever! I know right?) in what is one of the worst thrillers I’ve ever seen. To give you an idea: I loved I Know Who Killed Me and still defend it, so I can appreciate a good genre film. Everything about The Canyons however is bad, like bad soap opera bad. The only good thing about this film, sorry to be so vulgar: Tenille Houston’s glorious tits. Other than that there’s Gus Van Sant in the shortest of cameos and of course the beautiful scenery where the film takes place. This is an irredeemable film and I hope nobody sees it, for their own good.
That’s the only bad film of the week, luckily. If you watched a bad film and want to warn everyone about it: Please do. If not: I’m happy for you.