Tagged: Bad Movies

‘Bad’ Movies You Watched Last Week?

One bad movie. Let’s get it over with. I want to get to the good part.

Y Tu Mama Tambien (2001) – 5 (IMDb 7.6) – Drama (Mexico)
I love coming of age/summer-films/let’s-never-grow-up type of movies, but this one was bad for several reasons. I didn’t like it’s judgmental tone, the pacing is off, the editing is terrible and the ending is so boring and evasive it’s not even funny. The film uses a terrible narrative device, where whenever the narrator reads his horribly written script all audio must fade away, taking you completely out of the film. Now, I could accept that in part if he had something interesting to say, adding to the story or whatever, but the information he gives us is completely fucking useless. I couldn’t care less about the crummy details of these people’s life, just show us what’s happening right fucking now. It’s also a pathetic attempt at whimsical comedy, which never works because there’s one funny scene in the whole film and it happens fairly early on in the film.
A big fail on so many levels, this film is somewhat saved by its good cast, the performances they give are sub par, but I entirely blame the director for it. Alfonso Cuarón, whose name I kept hearing, is as overrated as it gets. I don’t know, maybe the film just didn’t work for me, but I do think a lot of what I dislike about this film is the director’s fault. The story and the idea per se are fine and I even like those a lot, but the execution and the composition are just dreadful. It just felt as if the director was trying to be edgy, but afraid to go all the way. It’s a cop-out, and although there are some good ideas thrown around, none of them are fully explored. And Maribel Verdú, who starts out as a fun character, just becomes the most annoying bitch ever somewhere around half film and for no good reason.

‘Bad’ Movies You Watched Last Week?

There’s always that one bad film it seems. Well, screw it. Here’s a mini-review of it.

Hatchet III (2013) – 4 (IMDb 5.5) – Horror (USA)
I kind of enjoyed the Hatchet franchise so far, but Part III was by far the  least fun entry. The first one is clearly the best, the second you watch because you liked the first, and the third you still have some hope, but at this point it’s not worth it anymore. This is a bad movie. Why? Because of annoying characters, contrived and illogical story lines and no sense of joy like in the first two films. Also, when your villain is basically immortal you lose interest, because you know the ‘good guys’ won’t kill him anyway. The worst part? It looks like they want to make a Hatchet IV, at least judging by that horrible ending. Is there some good left in this film? Well, Danielle Harris and Sid Haig are the only good things I can think of. The film starts out all right, good gore and interesting story, but then it just drags on and introduces characters and plot devices that just make you want to I don’t know, let’s say ‘scratch your head’.
The only “relief” is that Adam Green didn’t direct this, although the biggest problems lie in the writing, so I don’t know how much of a relief that really is. The first two films are very much horror comedies, but I don’t even remember there being jokes in this one. It’s like he’s trying to change genre in hopes to be taken more seriously or something. Guess what? That ship sailed a long time ago. Also, this has to be one of the most boring attempts at a “detective story” I’ve seen recently. And that’s counting those horrible Guy Ritchie films. At least those have something interesting going in the visual department: This one is below standard even for cheap horror films.

Did you guys see any bad films this past week? Did you see Hatchet III? What did you think of it?